News Flash: "My Life Is Bro"

In our society today, patriarchy is reinforced through overly aggressive actions by men towards women, due to men feeling disempowered and intimidated by the rise of feminism and women’s ability to speak up and fight for equality. This phenomenon is very clearly illustrated through a website titled “Mylifeisbro.com”, where “lax bros” post funny comments, in a similar fashion to sites such as “Texts From Last Night” and “F My Life.” People can click “Chill” or “Not Chill” after reading the comments and deciding whether they approve of the statement or think it is funny or cool. This medium acts as a way through which the general public can view men’s attitudes, including their derogatory comments towards women, and can see how the world around them reacts to the statements made.

Before getting into the principles of this website and how it is representative of the emasculation of men in our culture today, I believe that it is first important to define one of the words in the website: “Bro.” In the connotation of this website title, bro is considered the same thing as a “lax bro.” According to Urban Dictionary, “A lax bro is a guy who plays lacrosse and fully embraces the culture. Commonly found in Maryland, many also spend their time laxin’, going to Catholic schools, and boating… Lax bros will often get together for a lax sesh, which usually includes the following: some brews, some bowls, babes, Dispatch, O.A.R., hemp anklets, board shorts, lax jerseys, polos, rainbow flip flops, etc.” Obviously, not all boys who play lacrosse enjoy these specific activities or act in this manner, but this stereotypical lax bro lifestyle is the one that MLIB perpetuates.

One comment posted on MLIB is as follows: “I’m an intern at a business. I went to a meeting. The meeting ended, the bitches left, and all the bros stayed for another meeting. Women can’t make decisions. MLIB.” 84 readers thought this statement was chill, and 11 didn’t. I found this statement to be very disrespectful when first reading it, but couldn’t instantaneously tell why. After examining why I was so appalled by this comment by a random bro, I came to the conclusion that it was because he is pretty much saying that women have no voice and shouldn’t be taken seriously. Whether or not this bro seriously means what he is saying, it still propagates oppression, which is the immobilization of human beings due to their identity. I’m a major proponent of women succeeding in the workplace, and the fact that some women are put in a situation where they can not make a real impact in their jobs is very offensive because it is an act of silencing.

The common themes that were displayed on MLIB included references to girls as hoes, bitches, sluts, and slampieces, the importance of natty light in a bro’s life, comments on how women belong in the kitchen, should not hold serious jobs, are pretty much equal to objects, and should live to serve men (one said that the female diet should consist of cum and sandwiches). One example of a comment on the website which represents the constant references to women’s place in the house is this one: “Today my son asked me why brides wear white. I told him because the dishwasher needs to match the fridge and the stove. MLIB”. This posting received 145 Chill votes and 17 Not Chill votes, which I found very surprising. Why would the public, or at least the people who read this website, be so supportive of this derogatory attitude towards women? This unconcealed approval of this sexist viewpoint is dangerous because it makes others think that it is acceptable to treat women like they are objects who belong in the kitchen to serve men.

Another example of this disrespectful attitude towards women is as follows in a comment posted by a user of MLIB: “Today in class, some bitch was getting pissed at our jokes about women in kitchens. Later that day, I went to my local deli and got a sandwich. Who made me that sandwich you ask? That same bitch. It was sweet. MLIB.” 485 readers thought that this was a “Chill” situation, while 14 did not. This post describes a man putting women in their place, which according to this bro is the kitchen. Women have struggled for decades to break out of the stereotypical role of the stay-at-home mom, but apparently this progress has not become apparent to the male population.

In order to write this newsflash, it was only necessary for me to read through a few pages to get the sufficient amount of posts to support my argument. Surprisingly, it was hard for me to stop myself after reading more than twenty pages of the website. I found myself laughing at posts that were completely offensive to my gender and wanting to keep reading on to hear what these men had to say. Why did I keep reading? Why did I find such insulting and distasteful comments appealing? Perhaps Susan Douglas’ concept of enlightened sexism is true. Although I think that these stereotypes are okay because they are untrue and that we’ve proven them wrong and can therefore joke about them, it is possible that the sexist messages present in MLIB are actually having an impact on how I view women and perceive my own role in society. It is crucial to ask ourselves, “Are we really past that?” According to the overwhelming amount of “Chill” clicks on these posts, the public believes that we are.

After emerging myself in the MLIB website, I noticed a strong connection of the men’s attitudes to another event we learned about in class: the DKE incident at Yale. When the DKE pledges paraded around campus and specifically the Women’s Center chanting, “No means yes, yes means anal,” I saw this as an indication that men were uncomfortable with women’s rise of power, and that they felt that their masculinity was being threatened. In both MLIB and the DKE incident, men felt that it was necessary to try and put down women and the progress that they are making in the world. After reading Michael Kimmel’s article titled “Men—And Women—At Yale,” it seems that he would strongly agree with me. In this article, Kimmel states that, “we can see the men of DKE at Yale not as a bunch of angry predators, asserting their dominance, but as a more pathetic bunch of guys who see themselves as powerless losers, trying to re-establish a sexual landscape which they feel has been thrown terribly off its axis” (Kimmel 2010).

In conclusion, I saw these assertions by men as desperate struggles to attain power and regain their masculinity, which was previously threatened by women’s rise of power. I think it’s very interesting to examine how both women and men act in their respective social roles and react to women’s desire for equality in a world that is “still marred by gender inequality” (Kimmel 2010). This News Flash, more than any other, made me desperately want everyone to be treated as humans without the concept of gender maiming their life experience.

Works Cited

Kimmel, Michael Cebook. "Men -- and Women -- at Yale." Breaking News and Opinion on The Huffington Post. 20 Oct. 2010. Web. 04 Dec. 2010. .

Susan J. Douglass, Enlightened Sexism: The Seductive Message that Feminism’s Work is Done, 1st edition, Times Books.